It's a Shoe Thang!


- Monday, December 14, 2009

The Shoe Addicts Guide to Stepping Out for the Holidays

Look out shoe addicts, both near and far, 'cause it's party time!  It is? Yes, and we all know, the holiday season brings forth peace, joy, goodwill to all men and lots of social gatherings i.e. PARTIES.  Family parties, office parties, neighborhood parties and best of all parties with your closest friends and best girlfriends. So, what's a shoe addict to wear?

The answer is shoes, fabulous shoes of course.  And the first rule is, don't be caught dead in the same pair of fabulous shoes at two or more (NEVER!) parties in the same season.  Oh come on, you can't be serious?  Oh, but I am.  A TRUE shoe addict will tell you this mainly gives them a good reason to go shopping and buy several new pairs.  Everyone knows different types of parties require different styles of footwear. Right? And you don't want to get caught with you toes out in the wrong place, so-to-speak.  So, here's a few helpful tips to keep you right in step with all the festivities.

At some point, pretty much everyone has the obligation, I mean, the pleasure of attending their FAMILY holiday get together.  Besides the fact that you are visiting all your relatives at the same time, you should find that this will be your easiest party to get ready for.  And why shouldn't it be you've known these people all your life.  Though, if you (or your spouse, boyfriend or significant other) have the type of family that is painfully strict, overly judgemental, conservative to the extreme, and who are just waiting and willing to point out everyone elses flaws I recommand running away for the holidays.  No, not really, just do what you normally do and pray for the best.  As for everybody else, I suggest comfy shoes that make a statement even if you have to take them off and leave them at the door. 

But don't let that happen to you. Try doing what I do, wear great shoes or boots to the party and then change into brand new fabulous shoes once you're there. I'm sure your Granny won't mind one bit because the new shoes have never been worn outside.  However, if Auntie Complain-a-lot still has issues bring FAB slippers instead.

Then, there's the OFFICE or company party.  This one can be a little tricky so, lets take it in steps.  If it's YOUR party and you've been working there awhile then step up your look and show them what you're made of.  Stylish boots or sleek and a bit on the sexy side high heels can do the job easily.  Don't go overboard though, just like wearing too deep of a V-neck shirt (plunging cleavage) the wrong type of heels could make you the topic of nasty morning water cooler gossip.  This is not a place for hooker heels; they will haunt you 'til you retire or are forced to resign.  Now, if it's your spouse's OFFICE party and you want them to keep their job, go for heels that make your legs look extra long but don't make your butt stand out. He wants to make sure the guys are all jealous of what he has but not make the ladies claim you're a slut.  Though if you want him to get fired from the company, hooker heels work just fine, especially if they're on thigh high boots. Just saying!

The NEIGHBORHOOD shindig is a opportunity to show you're not only keeping up with the Jones' but you have them beat.  Go ahead party like a there's no tomorrow in the most expensive pair of celebration heels you own. But make sure they're new.  We all know that nosey neighbor who loves to report on every detail of everyones life.  You best believe she will bring up the fact that you wore those same shoes to last years holiday bash making sure she states that they are "soooo" last year.   That is if that's the kind of neighborhood you live in.  Hopefully it won't make any difference what shoes you wear. Especially if you and your neighbors are a close-knit group who just love to get together and share in the holiday spirit.  In that case, I'd wear the shoes you have in your collection that you know all the girls will like.  Brag about how you got them on sale and tell them where to get their very own pair.  Hopefully, this will be over several glasses of spiked eggnog or some festive cocktails.  Chocolate martinis, anyone?

Going out with your FRIENDS is the best party of all.  You get to wear anything you want.  Actually, you get to change you shoes as many times as you want during the evening too.  Hooker heels and sky high stilettos almost seem mandatory.   Wild styles and textures,  crazy colors and unique fabrics,  designer labels and unknown merchants are all acceptable.  Though, you know me and if I had my way, I'd be decked out in the latest Jimmy Choo rockstar heels on sale now. 

My pedicure will be pristine, and I will not leave my shoes at the door.  And you should make sure your shoes are noticed as much as mine are.  If they don't scream "look at me" when you enter the room then they're not the right pair for this soiree.   Whether or not you're on the dance floor or at the bar or simply hanging out in your girlfriend's basement people around should be drawn to you (for your personality, yes), but first they will be hypnotized by your great taste in shoes.  So, when you're having a few drinks take a few moments to work on your 10 second speech, 'cause all night long you'll be repeating the same things, " I know, right, I love these shoes. I got them on sale at_____, they're by_____ and girlfriend they make me feel like sex on a stick." Hmmm, where'd I hear that before? 

OK shoe addicts, that's all I have for you.  I know it's a bit off-center but so am I (I buy shoes everyday, remember).  I also know in this economy some people can't afford to buy new shoes for all their holiday parties.  So, wear something fabulous you already own and you'll still make everyone jealous, including me.  I know I'll be trying to get my hands on some of my friends, neighbors, co-workers and families shoes.  Being the TRUE shoe addict that I am I won't be able to help myself.  But that's how it has to be and you know it won't be the first time or the last 'cause It's a Shoe Thang!

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